Why Y’all Wanna Pick on Taylor?

The double-standards of societal narcissism exemplified in the public treatment of Taylor Swift

The ongoing criticism of Taylor Swift is that she writes songs about the people in her life. The joke is, “If you’ve dated Taylor Swift, expect a song to be written about you.” As if, no other artists in history used previous relationships as material for their art. As if, no other artist used their art to process their emotions through their creative talents.

Rather than look at all artists—writers, painters, sculptors, singers, etc.–let’s just look at songwriters like Taylor. In fact, let’s look at the songwriters on Rolling Stone’s list of 100 Greatest Songwriters of All Time; on which, Taylor ranks at position 97.

Rolling Stone says of Taylor, “Many singer-songwriters reach the point where they have too many great tunes to fit into a live show. Taylor Swift reached that peak before she turned 21. And then she just kept going. She might be the youngest artist on this list — as you may have heard, she was born in 1989, the year Green Day released their first record. But she’s already written two or three careers’ worth of keepers.”

Let’s look at the other songwriters on this list who wrote songs about the people in their lives:

100 Björn Ulvaeus and Benny Andersson of ABBA

Although they’ve been retroactively deemed a disco act, ABBA were shunned even by our club DJs until the early ’80s, when Björn Ulvaeus’s lyrics reflected the recent unraveling of both domestic unions that gave these two sets of married couples uncommon cohesion. This sense of gravity showed up not only in far more serious lyrics, but also in much weightier beats. Rather than sticking them in a rut, sorrow helped ABBA progress.

99 Tom T. Hall

Even, Tom T. Hall,said this about songwriting: “Songwriters aren’t good songwriters. People are good songwriters. You sit down as a person and write a song. If you’ve written a song by the time you stand back up, you’re a songwriter. But the person comes first”.

98 Otis Blackwell

Blackwell drew inspiration from his observations of relationships and the emotions that arise. He found inspiration in the frustration that often accompanies failed communication in relationships. He drew inspiration from the desire and yearning that often accompanies romantic encounters. Blackwell tapped into the universal experience of being madly in love and aimed to capture the breathlessness and excitement associated with new love. He drew inspiration from his own experiences and observations of individuals. Blackwell showcased his ability to infuse his own compositions with raw emotion.

96 Timbaland and Missy Elliott

The song “3:30 in the Morning” by Timbaland, featuring Missy Elliott, was released in 1998 as part of Timbaland’s album “Tim’s Bio: Life from da Bassment.” The song explores themes of trust, dedication, and communication in a romantic relationship. “If you listen to my songs, they tell stories,” Missy Elliott has said.

95 The Bee Gees

The Bee Gees drew inspiration from their personal experiences and observations of the world around them. Like many artists, the Bee Gees drew inspiration from their personal triumphs, struggles, and relationships when crafting their music. Their songs often reflect their own emotional journeys, allowing listeners to connect on a deep, personal level.

94 John Prine…

OMG! The drudgery of writing this essay… It appears that artists use their life experience to produce their art. Imagine that.

But, we all know this. So, what is really going on here is judgment of Taylor’s experiences and simplifying it to just her behavior. This practice of judging others has never seemed so huge than now with Taylor Swift. Why?

I suspect, if Taylor were a man writing about his many relationships, it would barely be a topic of conversation. The focus would, likely, just be about the quality of the song and its impact on audiences. With the sexual revolution of the ’80s and ’90s, I would think we had gotten past the old labels…that men who have many relationships are ‘studs’ and women who do are ‘sluts’. If a man were to write about rivalry and betrayal by a friend, he would be perceived as processing his anger through a positive outlet. But, a woman writes about it and she’s considered whiny, petty, and vindictive…’a woman scorned’ and all that. Also, when have we ever ‘diagnosed’ a male songwriter as narcissistic; but, today we imply Taylor has Borderline Personality Disorder?

Why is this decade in history fraught with so much hateful judging? I think it is related to the co-occurring theme of taking personal responsibility for one’s own life. But, instead of most people actually looking inward and applying this to themselves; in a narcissistic way, society has ramped up the practice of projection—pointing the finger at everyone else whom they deem is failing at keeping themselves accountable in order to distract themselves and others from the fact that the ‘pointer’ is actually failing. It’s called holding others to a higher standard than one holds oneself.

Here’s a suggestion: Unless Taylor Swift’s relationship choices affect you, personally, butt out! Let us elevate Taylor’s songs to what they actually are—art. And, the beauty of art is in the eye of the beholder. If her songs fail to appeal to you, listen to something else. It’s that simple.

So, Taylor wrote a song about you and, now, you want to call her crazy? It’s not like she cut off her ear and snail-mailed it to you in a shoe-box. Calm the f*ck down!